勇于推销你自己

你工作勤奋认真,十分投入,加班加点,这些都不言而喻。晋升的时候到了,你的老板一定会认为你是领导职位的最佳人选,不是吗?

很多女性都是这样想的,但是却眼睁睁地看着那些升职的大好机会一个个地落在了那些更愿意在工作上自吹自擂的家伙身上——而这些人通常都是男性。

ISR,一家总部在芝加哥的全球雇员搜寻及咨询公司在2004年8月进行的一项调研当中调查了2900名来自5个不同行业的员工,发现女性主管们的决策出发点通常是工作关系以及公司的利益,而男性高管门则更侧重他们个人的利益,更好的为自己打算。

Ronna Lichtenberg是《女人,天生就能赢》一书的作者,也是Clear Peak Communications管理咨询公司的总裁。她认为自我宣传对于男性和女性来说都非常重要。“每一个人都需要让其他人知道他们随时准备迎接新的挑 战,并且为了把事情做好,自己应该得到必要的支持,”她说。“这样的支持可以是更高的薪水,也可以是一个更重要的职位,从而能够在公司里得到一个合适的定 位。”

自我推销是什么?——不是什么?

Lichtenberg认为,自我推销就是“主动让其他人知道你有哪些优点,能做什么,并且正在做什么。一种方式充分考虑和照顾他人的感受。和许多其他的人一样,我称之为‘促销’,还有一种方式是以个人为中心的,是不太合适的。”

这一区别是很重要的,因为很多女性感觉宣传自己一定会让别人对自己产生反感,会影响到自己的人际关系,Lichtenberg说。“而且,她们担心如果 她们的自我推销太张扬的话,会招致人们的反感。而研究也表明事实的确是这样——事实上,其他女人也可能会成为非常刻薄的批评家。”她补充道。

害怕别人的评价可能会导致缺乏安全感,这也让自我推销变得更难。但是装出来的自信和真正的自信一样有用。“没有人知道你的心在砰砰的跳,你的膝盖在发抖,”Lichtenberg说,“强迫自己这样做几次之后,你就会觉得容易一些。”

利用你的长处

那么应该如何同时做到自我推销和客观地评价自己呢?

首先,记住不是所有的女人都是一样的。“有些女人的工作作风被我称作‘蓝色’风格,她们注重完成自己的任务,却不太重视工作当中人与人的关系处理,” Lichtenberg解释说。“‘蓝色’女性希望直奔主题,写电子邮件的时候不会附上问候或者称呼,她们相信不是成功,就是失败。

“而‘粉色’女性则希望亲自了解自己的业务伙伴,相信首先建立良好的关系能够让业务的进展更迅速,更有效率。她们相信能够取得双赢的结果。”她补充道。

因为不同的女性有着不同的特点,而女性宣传自己的对象又各不相同,并没有一种放之四海而皆准的方法。Lichtenberg解释说,除了要了解自己的长 处以及如何突出它们的重要性以外,“对于所有的女性来说,关键是要花时间好好思考一下对方的需求。这样你就能够以一种他们能够接受的方式表达你的要求和希 望。”

“多花一些时间来考虑清楚你到底希望得到什么——我称其为‘思辨’,”Lichtenberg建议。“这样你才能够真正理 解你在市场当中的价值。对于自己能够提供哪些东西,竞争形势以及如何能够提高自身价值了解得越清楚,在你临时需要对某人推销自己的时候,也就可以越发从容 不迫。

最善于推销自己的女性是那些关心他人,并且主动通过交谈表现出自己关心对方的女人。“她们知道和别人分享自己的经历是和他人建立联系的方式。正确的方式是帮助别人,而不是损害别人。”

Don’t Hesitate to Self-Promote


Your hard work, dedication to your job and long hours speak for themselves. Come promotion time, your boss will see you’re the best candidate for a leadership position, right?

Many women think this, and then watch as those big promotions go to those more willing to toot their own horn at work — often men.

Chicago-based global employee search and consulting firm ISR talked to 2,900 employees in five different industries for an August 2004 survey and found that female executives are driven by working relationships and what’s best for the company, while men are driven by what’s at stake for them personally and are better able to strategize about themselves.

Self-promotion is important for both sexes, according to Ronna Lichtenberg, author of Pitch Like a Girl: How a Woman Can Be Herself and Still Succeed and president of management-consulting firm Clear Peak Communications. “Everyone needs to let other people at work know they are someone who is ready to tackle new challenges and deserves the support they need to get things done,” she says. “That support can range from a higher salary to a more important job to just being positioned properly.”

What Self-Promotion Is — And Isn’t

According to Lichtenberg, self-promotion is “taking the lead to let other people know about good things you have done, can do and are doing? There is a way to do it that is thoughtful of and sensitive to other people’s feelings, which like many other people, I call pitching, and there is a way to do it that feels self-centered and inappropriate.”

This distinction is important to make, because many women feel that the only way to promote themselves is to be obnoxious and strain relationships, says Lichtenberg. “Also, they are worried that people won’t like them if they seem like they are self-promoting too aggressively, and research suggests that is true — that in fact, other women can be particularly harsh critics,” she adds.

Fear of being judged can lead to insecurity, which makes it hard to self-promote. But faking confidence is almost as good as feeling it. “No one else knows your heart is pounding and your knees are a little wobbly,” says Lichtenberg. “After forcing yourself to do it a few times, you’ll find it gets easier.”

Use Your Strengths

So how do you self-promote while remaining true to yourself?

First, remember that not all women are the same. “Some women have what I would call a lue’ style, which means she focuses on tasks and doesn’t look for a lot of person-to-person connection at work,” Lichtenberg explains. “A blue woman wants to get to the point, writes emails without greetings or salutations and believes in win/lose.

“A ink’ woman likes to know the person she is doing business with as a person, believes that having a bonding moment first can make work done on tasks go faster and more effectively and believes in win/win,” she adds.

Because of the differences among women and the various people they’re pitching, there isn’t a single right way to do it for everyone, other than learning about your individual strengths and how to leverage them, Lichtenberg explains. “The key, though, for pink, blue and striped styles is to spend a lot of time thinking about the other person’s needs so you can explain your needs and desires in a way that makes it possible for them to hear it,” she says.

“Spend some real time on what I call isioning’ — being clear about what you really want,” Lichtenberg advises. “From there, you can move to really understanding the value of what you are offering in the marketplace. The more homework you do about what Me Inc. offers, how it stacks up to the competition and how you can improve the value of your offering, the better off you will be when you have to quickly pitch yourself to someone else.”

The women best at self-promotion are those who are interested in others and show it by starting conversations. “They know that sharing something about themselves is a way to connect to other people and is, if done correctly, doing someone a favor rather than a disservice,” she explains.

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